Self-love is one of those concepts that can be deceivingly complex. Nonetheless, behind that unassuming façade lies a plethora of questions with complicated answers.

What does it mean to love yourself? How do you find the balance between loving yourself and coexisting with others? Where do you draw the line?

According to the Brain & Behavior Research Foundation, self-love is about supporting and protecting your physical, psychological, and spiritual growth. It involves valuing and prioritizing yourself, your happiness, and your needs.

However, the journey to follow is different for every person. That is where books can help—they provide a path on a trip you must partake in alone.

Since no two people are the same, there are as many psychology book options as tastes and styles. Nonetheless, the following works all highlight different tools and methods to light the path on your self-love journey.

Buy Yourself the F*cking Lilies

by Tara Schuster

Discovering, reclaiming, and redefining self-love does not have to be a daunting task. In fact, it can be a joyous journey where you can learn how to laugh your way into loving your flaws and mistakes alongside your virtues and successes.

Tara Schuster learnt that lesson the hard way. Her book aims to be the voice she wishes she had during her own journey.

A successful Comedy Central executive and a chronically anxious and self-medicated woman, Schuster went through highs and lows on her path toward self-love. Her book Buy Yourself the F*cking Lilies is equal parts a memoir and a reminder that you deserve the nice things you like—with a fair share of the comedy she’s known for.

Untamed: Stop Pleasing, Start Living

by Glennon Doyle

Another self-love book that draws from the writer’s personal life, Untamed is a memoir as much as it is a critique of the cultural setbacks that plague women’s journey toward unfettered happiness.

Doyle highlights how societal standards assign women certain roles and expectations, which establishes a set of limitations that—consciously or subconsciously—act as traps for many women seeking something beyond.

Untamed borrows from Doyle’s life experiences and anecdotes to deliver the truth many women need to hear: self-love is only possible when you understand that the shoulds and musts of society are not necessarily marks of true happiness.

Love for Imperfect Things

by Haemin Sunim

Author Haemin Sumin is a Zen Buddhist monk from South Korea, which may predispose readers to believe Love for Imperfect Things is a religious book with complex, philosophical sayings.

Nothing further from the truth.

Love for Imperfect Things is a book that promotes self-love from a gentle and warm angle. Everything on each page encourages peace of mind—from the simple and easy-to-digest words of wisdom to the beautiful and whimsical illustrations.

But at its core, Love for Imperfect Things is what its name indicates—gentle encouragement to accept and embrace the imperfections that make life what it is.

Get Out of Your Own Way

by Mark Goulston, Philip Goldberg

Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior poses one question to readers—what if you are becoming your worst enemy?

Although life poses many challenges to individual goals, Goulston highlights limitations that come from within, particularly self-sabotaging attitudes. Procrastination, self-pity, guilt, and inaction are described as self-defeating habits that stand in the way of self-love and success./p>

Far from claiming to be the solution to deep-rooted habits, the book encourages introspection to discover your self-defeating behavior—and provides tools to inspire action against them.

Make Your Bed: Small Things That Can Change Your Life… And Maybe The World

by William H. McRaven

On May 17, 2014, Admiral William H. McRaven gave a commencement speech at the University of Texas. It went viral within a few days, popularly known as the ‘Make Your Bed’ speech.

Within those 20 minutes, McRaven established ten principles to create positive change within ourselves and the world. He would expand upon these concepts in his book Make Your Bed a year later. 

Intertwining short aphorisms with his Navy SEAL experiences, McRaven establishes ten principles that make small changes—with tremendous consequences. Something as small as making your bed in the morning can induce a sense of accomplishment that will, eventually, prepare you for further success.

Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before?

by Julie Smith

Dr. Julie Smith is a clinical psychologist, a best-selling author, and a viral TikTok sensation on mental health.

To expand on topics she discusses in these short videos, Dr. Smith released Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before? Her book aims to become the toolkit you need to understand, protect, and fortify your mental well-being.

From addressing the potential physical roots of emotional distress to delivering simple exercises and graphics to solve everyday problems, Dr. Smith’s straightforward book understands that self-love blossoms in a healthy mind.

You Are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life

by Jen Sincero

Direct, to the point, and very no-nonsense. Jen Sincero’s writing is reminiscent of a courageous and bold best friend, giving you the advice you need to change your life.

You Are a Badass is a book that focuses on a central idea: your actions and circumstances result from your deep-seated beliefs, sitting in your subconsciousness. As such, you will become the titular “badass” once you challenge your false subconscious beliefs with conscious actions and embrace what makes you unique.

Dear Self

by Ruby Dhal

Rising from the depths of Instagram comes Ruby Dhal, a British-Afghan writer with a penchant for poetry and a talent for speaking to her audience’s soul.

Dear Self, published in 2020, is paradoxically her longest book and a “bite-sized” work. It is divided into four macro-chapters—Self-Love, Heartbreak, Love, and Healing—containing micro-sections discussing various situations, circumstances, and topics.

Lauded for her beautiful writing and ability to resonate with deeply personal circumstances, Dhal’s Dear Self feels like the gentle words of your inner self.

The Mountain Is You

by Brianna Wiest

With The Mountain Is You, Brianna Wiest highlights the role that self-sabotaging behavior plays as an obstacle to self-love and fulfillment.

Self-sabotage, she argues, is the byproduct of conflicting needs between your consciousness and subconsciousness. Subsequently, you can only overcome the obstacle by finding its root cause and, subsequently, grow comfortable with the idea of change.

Setting aside external influences and problems, Wiest poses that one of the biggest setbacks in life comes from within—in short, you are the mountain you need to climb.

Good Vibes, Good Life

by Vex King

Vex King’s Good Vibes, Good Life is a book highlighting the importance of positive thinking for self-love and consolidating one’s goals. However, it does not fall into the all-too-common toxic positivity trap.

Instead, King recognizes that positive thinking is often the key to manifesting positive results, yet it is only the first step in the journey. As an often-quoted line from the book says, “self-love is the balance between accepting yourself as you are while knowing you deserve better and then working towards it.”

Overall, the book’s philosophy is that emotions and thoughts profoundly affect reality. Subsequently, developing a healthy emotional profile is the mandatory starting point for achieving concrete results.

Self-Love is a Common Goal in an Individual Journey

Although a healthy approach to self-love is the ideal mindset for all humanity, this shared goal has infinite roads. Everyone must partake in the journey alone, and the method that may work for someone could be challenging for someone else.

The aforementioned books offer many approaches to developing your inner self. At least one is bound to provide tips that adjust to your beliefs, lifestyle, and thought patterns.

The good news? You can find all these books through BookScouter.com, across over 20+ online booksellers. All you need is the ISBN, name, or author; the search engine will show all offers to buy books at the best price so you can instantly immerse into a self-love guide with no harm to your wallet.

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