Renowned humorist Bill Scheft stretches comedic singles into stand-up triples through the oddest of couples in this hilarious debut novel.
Morton Martin Spell, a once-brilliant, now-infirm seventy-five-year-old writer has begun to slide into a state of delirium. He thinks Mount Sinai Hospital is an exclusive golf course and his catheter is a gym bag. His only link to reality is his terminally unambitious thirty-five-year-old nephew, who makes his living as a hired gun for thirteen softball teams and still goes by the name College Boy.
But College Boy's body has begun to betray him -- almost as much as his lack of ambition. (His only legitimate paycheck comes from a once-a-week gig as an in-studio laugher on a drive-time morning radio show.) Not only that, The Dirt King, a small-time gangster who controls all the replacement soil in Central Park, is after him. As their lives collide, College Boy takes refuge in the arms of Sheila, his uncle's cleaning woman and a part-time call girl. And then it gets weird.

The Ringer

Literature & Fiction

Scheft, Bill

United States

Harper

Morton Martin Spell - a once-brilliant, now-infirm seventy-five-year-old writer - is sliding into delirium. He thinks Mount Sinai Hospital is an exclusive golf course and his catheter is a gym bag. His only link to reality is his thirty-five-year-old nephew, who makes his living as a hired gun for thirteen softball teams and still goes by the name College Boy. But College Boy's body has begun to betray him - almost as much as his lack of ambition. (His only legitimate paycheck comes from a gig as a laugher on a morning radio show.) Not only that, the Dirt King, a small-time gangster who controls all the replacement soil in Central Park, is after College Boy. As their lives collide, College Boy takes refuge in the arms of Sheila - his uncle's cleaning woman and a part-time call girl. And then it gets weird.

The Ringer: A Novel

Comics & Graphic Novels

Manga

Harper Paperbacks

In Bill Scheft's hilarious second novel, a finalist for the 2006 Thurber Prize for American Humor, five former members of a rock band, fast approaching age fifty, try to overcome their petty feuds and failed (and failing) marriages to recapture the fading yet distinct tone of their music and friendships. 
In 1967, while students at Chase Academy, the prep-school garage band known as the Truants recorded a vanity album, Out of Site. Thirty years later, they discover that a record collector has paid $10,000 for a rare copy of the disk, and an avid fan-turned-promoter convinces them to reunite and cash in. But miles from the horizon of youth, weighted down by shortsighted choices and mortgaged ambitions, they find that's not so simple. 
Richie, a divorce lawyer, must stop seducing clients with karaoke. John, a dermatologist, needs to escape the would-be patients who corner him at parties, sleeves rolled up—or worse. Tim must introduce his wife to his drum set, hidden in the attic the way most guys hide porn. Brian has to desert the thesis he's been "completing" for twenty-five years. And somebody, somehow, has to track down Jerry, a hopeless gambler/Equal addict last seen flying to the Caymans with $1 million taped to his body. Along the way they encounter a delusional sister, an anatomically blessed baker, Les Paul, and former J. Geils Band lead singer Peter Wolf. 
With his trademark relentless humor, light and dark, and his compassion for the second acts of the baby boomer experience, Bill Scheft follows up his critically acclaimed debut novel, The Ringer, with another hysterical, touching look at chaotic lives in search of harmony.

Time Won't Let Me: A Novel

The five members of the Truants  Richie, John, Brian, Jerry and Tim  graduated from toney Chase Academy in New Hampshire 30 years ago. Before they left, they managed to record an album called "Out of Site." Nearing the age of 50, they learn that a German record collector has paid $10,000 for one copy of their work.
 At the urging of Dino Paradise, a grossly overweight and overly avid fan, the Truants aim to reunite and cash in. But miles from the horizon of youth, weighed down by bad marriages and mortgaged ambitions, they will have to get out of their own way to get back together. Richie, a divorce lawyer, will have to tear himself away from seducing clients with his karaoke skills. John, a dermatologist, needs to escape all the wouldbe patients who drop their pants at parties to ask for his advice. Tim must convince his wife to accept his drum set, which he keeps hidden in the attic the way most guys hide porn. Brian will have to step away from the thesis he's been barely trying to complete for 25 years. And all four will have to track down Jerry, a degenerate gambler/Equal addict who was last seen flying to the Caymans for his bookie with $1 million in cash taped to his body.
 And that's not to mention the delusional sister, the anatomicallyblessed baker, a couple of vengeful spouses, Les Paul, and former J. Geils lead singer Peter Wolf.

Humor & Satire

A collection of one hundred top columns by the popular Sports Illustrated humorist relates numerous aspects of everyday life to sports, in a volume that shares his observations on such topics as the Democratic convention, athlete criminal activities, and reality television.

The Best of the Show: A Classic Collection of Wit and Wisdom

Sports & Outdoors

Grand Central Publishing

- "The Show" is the second most widely-read column in Sports Illustrated, after Rick Reilly, who will write one of the book's introductions. Sports Illustrated has over three million subscribers, the third highest magazine circulation in the United States, and is read by 23 million adults each week. - The Best Of "The Show" will appeal to fans of Rick Reilly's Life of Reilly (Total/Sports Illustrated, 2000) and Bill Geist's Fore!Play (Warner, 2001), both of which were bestsellers. - Scheft was the Emmy Award-nominated head monologue writer for David Letterman for 13 years and routinely appears on the air with him. He is a frequent guest on the talk show circuit and on sports radio programs all over the country.

The Best of The Show: A Classic Collection of Wit and Wisdom

Reference

Everything Hurts: A Novel

Catapulted into stardom after writing a best-selling satirical criticism of the self-help industry, newspaper columnist Phil Camp suffers health setbacks that are not improved by traditional methods and finds himself depending on those he once despised. By the author of The Best of the Show.

Simon&Schuster

Phil Camp has a problem. Not that he wrote a self-help parody, Where Can I Stow My Baggage?, that the world took seriously and became a bestseller, or that he’s been using a phony name. No, Phil’s problem is the limp he’s had for months. His constant pain leads him to Dr. Samuel Abrun, a real doctor who wrote a real self-help book (The Power of "Ow!") that has made thousands of people pain-free. So what happens when the self-help fraud meets the genuine item? Does Phil get better? Can he hobble out of his own way to help himself? Most important, can the reader make it through fifty pages without thinking, Wait a minute. Is that a twinge I feel in my lower back, or just gas? Phil embraces the doctor’s unorthodox treatments, but saves some passion for Abrun’s daughter Janet—who has her own theories about relieving his pain. Meanwhile, Phil delves into his dark past with the Irish Shrink, his psychotherapist. And to top it off, Phil confronts his nemesis, a right-wing radio blowhard, only to find out they share a common enemy—the same family. Like Carl Hiassen and Larry David, Bill Scheft knows that the best humor is excruciating. In Everything Hurts, pain is the ultimate jester.

In Shrink Thyself, Charlie Traub decides to leave psychotherapy and live the unexamined life. A noble goal, which would be even more noble if his former therapist (now his friend) didn't turn out to be beyond inappropriate and his mother didn't die in a way that would have made Freud transfer to dental school. Despite all unexamined evidence to the contrary, Charlie just might be unable to accept that wherever he goes, there he is.

Shrink Thyself: A Novel

Literary

Rare Bird Books, A Vireo Book

See the best price to sell, buy, or rent books by Scheft, Bill. BookScouter helps to compare book prices from 25+ online bookstores and 30+ buyback vendors with a single search.

Books by Scheft, Bill

See the best price to sell, buy, or rent books by Scheft, Bill. BookScouter helps to compare book prices from 25+ online bookstores and 30+ buyback vendors with a single search.

The Ringer

The Ringer: A Novel

Time Won't Let Me: A Novel

Time Won't Let Me: A Novel

The Best of the Show: A Classic Collection of Wit and Wisdom

The Best of The Show: A Classic Collection of Wit and Wisdom

Everything Hurts: A Novel

Everything Hurts: A Novel

Shrink Thyself: A Novel